I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Randomize
