Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as they left, you opened the door, dropped your pants then yelled "don't leave, this is what you're missing"
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
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