the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Randomize
