Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I thought 5 times was beyond my capabilities but her tongue was like a penis defibrillator. Clear!
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
