can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
