that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
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you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He's the kind of drunk guy that would pee in your mouth while you give him head.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
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I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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