So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I walk into the pharmacy and I'm like "I need three morning after pills" and the guy was like "uhhhh". All I said was "we didn't plan it, we all just got laid the same night"
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
Randomize
