I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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