He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
No hurry on coming over. My body currently wants everything on the inside to be on the outside. But really. Don't hurry.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize
