420 ftw
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Netflix keeps asking me if I'm still watching just because I've been sitting here all afternoon...why do I feel like my tv is judging my life choices?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
