Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
