...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Also since my birthday I've on average fucked a new guy every 12.5 days. I'm doing an excel spreadsheet
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
