I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
He texted me at 3am that you cut your hand at the bar and were bleeding all over.
I woke up to a text thinking you bled out at a bar, turns out you got your butthole licked.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
Randomize
