the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
The things happening in my intestines right now should only ever happen at truck stops and frat houses.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
dude you literally had like 30 screwdrivers, i thought you were gonna die
that explains why my vomit smells like it came from florida
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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