Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize