I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
I got back from work this morning after working the night shift to find an NFL player scaling the side of our apartment...from your window. He just took sneaking out to all new level. Care to explain?
I think that about sums it up, actually.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize