i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
She was running around the bar, demanding everyone call her Jesus or else she would attack them like a llama. ack.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
And here I am, playing fetch with my cat at two in the morning.
Randomize
