Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
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