I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
North Korea, Best Korea!
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
twelve hours since my last beer and i just blew a .08, time to go to the library
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize