I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
