you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
