dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst part about living in a small town is partying with your pharmacist and then having to buy Plan B from him the next morning.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
Randomize