Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
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