She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dunno, but she kept buying me shots and asking me to go places with her. oh btw we're signed up to go bungee jumping Saturday
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
I told him I had the birth control implant in my arm and he looked me in the eyes, said "Science!" and came in me
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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