Moan for me like Helen Keller
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Randomize
