ive decided theres a fine line between accepting money for sex and letting someone buy you late night taco bell and knowing that if he hadnt you wouldnt be in his bed right now
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
It's no shave November. This is our time.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
Randomize