nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
He only had napkins in the bathroom... no toilet paper. If I fuck him, am I settling?
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Randomize
