"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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