Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy