I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
What's everyones problem with my costume?!
It looks like a unicorn came on your face.
I wish I had more reasons to start sentences with the phrase, "Here's the thing you've got to remember about cougars ...
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize
