Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
Randomize