walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
dude, i woke up with a mini keg on my night stand. again. like wtf
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
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