Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
the only reason i even kissed her was because we were having sex when it midnight, and i heard people yelling "happy new year."
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
My walk of shame was far more interesting today. He's moving and was cleaning out his apartment, so not only was I carrying my clothes, I also walked away with 4 bottles of cheap wine and a jar of ragu.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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