the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
