This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
Also, I have your check. Also, still wanna drop acid?
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
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