wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
