after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
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