I just pynch a tree in the face
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
