I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
Randomize
