you win again, gameday.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I just realized the only way to play Edward forty-hands is commando in a skirt. This intelligence kick is really doing me justice.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Randomize
