Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
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