i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
