so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
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