so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
Randomize