plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
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