i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Judge me...This apron fits PERFECTLY when I have no clothes on
Who said I was judging? More like congratulating.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
There are leaves in my underwear?
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
Randomize
