i don't plan on having that self control this summer
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Randomize
