I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Sitting on my couch watching TV in my underwear drinking a bottle of wine.... and you want to interrupt me to come pick you up. No I will not do it.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize