whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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