Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
you know whats weird about having a girlfriend....I look forward to masturbating now....sort of like quality me time.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
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