Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
He ripped off his shirt and tried to give me CPR. That damn bong.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
Randomize
